Your WHY

 I've been on an intense thought process for me the last 12 hours or so. I keep wondering what my true purpose is.

When I was a kid, I just felt it in my bones that I was meant for something, but I didn't know what. I thought I'd be an actress, famous artist, author, or poet, an Airforce pilot, or Archeologist. Obviously, those dreams have not panned out thus far. I just felt deep down I was here for a reason bigger than even I could understand.

 

Why else would God put me here? Simply to live by going to work each day, breaking my body and mind without reason? I couldn't understand that. Maybe that's why part of me lost contact with God, among other things. The world has a way of beating you down and you can easily lose sight of what you're really here on earth to do.

 

Anyway, last night I prayed and prayed for God to show me the way. Show me what I'm meant to do. I did this a couple weeks ago, too, and had a dream. It still doesn't fully make sense to me, that dream. So, last night I asked again, please show me what work I can do that will fulfill my longing of purpose and also do the work He needs me to do with my time here.

 

As you know, physically certain things are hard for me now so the idea of medical work now seems like a stretch for me. Maybe I could do a few hours of that type of work but it would hurt and I'd have very little quality of life that way, I think?

 

I woke up today feeling pressure. It's like what I imagine animals feel before a storm. I feel a buzzing sort of tension. Like I'm near something big. I took a shower to get ready for the day and decided to listen to my "Positive mindset Podcast" and the episode that played was "Finding your WHY" which talks about how to find your path. What is your passion… Breaking apart those passions to find what you do and don't like about them so that whatever you choose to do, it'll inspire you to keep going even when it's hard because it's your heart's calling.

 

Then I left this morning to get a few items, some of them in my original dream a few weeks ago, just to see if it sparked something in my brain. On my drive, the first song that came on was "Two sparrows in a Hurricane." Which talks about finding your way even when it's hard.

 

On my way back home, I saw a sign in a neighbors yard that read, "Be the energy you want to see in the world." Wow!

 

So, now I'm sitting here thinking and thinking. What IS my WHY? What is my passion, what is my goal? What inspires me? I know I want to help others, inspire others… but that's so very broad… Everyone can help others… Retail workers, medical staff, gas station attendants, bartenders, etc… So how do I narrow it down?

 

I feel like I'm so close but I'm just missing that one link from my thought process to my actual calling.

 

I have a meeting with Megan tonight. Maybe I'll talk to her about this and see if she can help me break it down further.

 

I'm so grateful for the signs I now can't unsee. They're everywhere! Now if I can just decipher them or connect them.

 

What are your passions/callings? What do you FEEL you were meant to do in your life's journey?