Pure Joy

I am literally crying… snot, tears, the works crying for joy right now. I hugged my daughter and husband (Connor is with James so I called crying lol) so tight when I read the results.

 

I'm not sure I can fully express my happiness right now. It's such a beautiful, full, wholesome feeling right now. It's consuming and amazing…

 

Earlier last week, I had told my uncle that it was like being pregnant and "knowing" it was a boy or a girl, but because I hadn't seen inside me there was that tiny sliver of "maybe."

 

I'm putting A LOT of work into myself. Investing in everything, every avenue I can because I know I am worth it to be here. I know I have a purpose even if I am unsure of what exactly that purpose is right now… but I am supposed to be here. So every avenue I can do with cancer, I am. No avenue is too "weird", "cliché", or "worthless."

 

I immediately starting crying, hugged my family, and messaged Megan, my holistic doctor with extreme enthusiasm. Mark my words, she had a hand in this as well. I know a lot of what she has told me I started before I met her but she reinforced my beliefs. She gave my beliefs the confidence I needed. Traditional medicine, though effective in some ways doesn't treat the ROOT CAUSE of cancer.

 

It's fully obvious to me WHY I had cancer… I not only suppressed all my emotions, anger, resentment, etc but on top of that, I smoked, ate, and drank garbage. Your body can only take so much. Pick your poison essentially. I stopped smoking, started eating cleaner, stopped drinking pop, started taking LOTS of needed supplements, and started working on ME.

 

To some, this may seem insignificant. One scan. But to ME it’s the WORLD. This cancer is meant to destroy me. It's not like other cancers. With tumor still left in me, the hope in the traditional medicine world is bleak. But here I am. Happy. Healthy. No regrowth. As long as I don’t get into an accident, I'm guaranteed at least another 3 months to live (my next scans).

 

I have faith in my FAITH. I have faith in ME. I have in MEGAN. I have faith in my CHANGES. I literally am a walking miracle in the grand scheme of things. I have had so many "unlikely" things happen and yet, everything that happens is for the good. So, God must have something bigger planned for me. And I WIILL rise to the challenge. Whatever he wants me here for, I will do with grace, determination, and ferocity.

 

Here I come!!!